Eco Green Lifestyle

Hi Y'all! Its been a minute ey? Well, its kinda cos I haven't been feeling very inspired of late. I found that, on reading my old posts, I was coming off as a bitter black woman. I'm not the most positive person, but neither do I sit on a pedestal pin-picking at the flaws of every moving thing on this earth. Its tiring.

 Blazer : Thrifted (Wales) | Waterfall Tanktop : Blue Inc | Trousers : Thrifted (Croydon)

When people decide to 'go green', they usually cut out the 'bad' from their lives. In the conventional sense, it involves recycling, using eco-friendly lightbulbs, boiling less water or wasting less, etc. I thought the best way to turn my negative outlook on life, was to adopt this lifestyle in regards to my professional and social life. This involves, waking up with a smile on my face, praying and reading the bible more, making an effort to keep in contact with good friends more often, listen to good music, etc.

 Necklace : Dorothy Perkins | Bracelet : Costume Jewellery from a Summer Church Fayre

Wedges Primark | Turban : BIY Tutorial using scarf from Bloomsbury

I'm all for re-evaluation of life, and all that jazz, but I don't think 'going green' should be such a drastic move that you feel yourself back-pedalling at the soonest convenience. It is SO easy to fall when you set the bar so high, but this eco-friendly lifestyle I'm adopting isn't a whole new thing, but a modification of the improvements I set out to change from the start of the New Year. After being called out once or twice for seeming so bitter of late, I had to take this step. We live in a 'blame culture' where its easy to pass on the blame for a bad friendship to the other party, or to displace your bad mood on your shitty boss who's grinding you to a pulp, working you to the bone. However, I think its how YOU choose to handle it thats far more telling of your character, than the circumstances life seems to throw at you.

I had my first ever appraisal at work this week, and it was a great indicator of how my 'green' modifications had panned out. I'm an employee that absorbs ideas for improvements, and takes advice quite well. I believe in the power of constructive criticism, and even when the former part of that phrase is lacking and I find myself in the lion's den over an error on a client's file, I maintain an air of calm and control and diplomatically solve the issue the best way I can. In the workplace, there is no real room for a tantrum, as Kelly Cutrone's infamous book so bluntly puts it, "If you have to cry, go outside". So also are friendships not the place to harbour bad blood and bear grudges, thats what enemies are for. Friendships are a home away from home. Someone/ people we go to find solace, partners we count on to bear/share our brudens, without judgment. 'Eco Green Lifestyle' is a life where friends are recycled and made to feel loved as you find the time to put in the right objects of affection into that relationship box. Work is a platform for professional development and gaining insight, and with that outlook, you will be accorded more responsibility and given more opportunities to learn more about your role.

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Go green to live a life on a high that can't be replicated by juicing down a coffee bean. Xisses

Menswear Mondays: The Cover-up

Gah! I love a guy in a suit. And what I love more is one that throws on a scarf and a wooly coat over it. I just wanna lap 'em all up...its the sexiest thing, like, EVER! Don't you agree? What I can't stand, however, is how the coat (or cover-up, for the benefit of this post) can hide a multitude of sins. Now, its coming to the season where every guy is tryna max out their gym cards and get their body right in time for white tee's to entice chics like buzzing bees. So, as the coats are flung to their respective storage spots, one is left to wonder, what lies beneath?

 Coat : Littlewoods | Shrug : Lipsy (eBay) | Shirt : Blanco (Gran Canaria) | Skirt : H&M

So also is it with a guy's attitude. Everyone knows you put on a facade when you first meet a girl. It may not be intentional, but you wanna put your best foot forward. So out comes the game, the wooing, the charm....but what lies beneath? Some guys can cleverly mask a multitude of sins beneath their charm, from the breadths of a child and a baby momma, to the depths of a criminal conviction. I know some of my readers will gasp at the extremity of these instances, but I can testify to the truth of these scenarios. Trust me, its not beyond the realm of belief.

 Bag : ZARA | Chelsea Boots : Dorothy Perkins 

An episode of 'How I Met Your Mother' explored the possibility of everyone carrying their [metaphorical] baggage around with them, labelled. That way, everyone is aware of the issues you have from the get-go, before falling in too deep. My male readers will shake their heads at this, for sure! There's NO girl in their right mind that would like you from day1, having told her you're 30 years of age, live at home with your mother and father twins? I stand my ground. Just as an obese man parades in a Prada coat, pretending that the bulk is all muscle, so also is the illusion of every man's game.

Literature : My Last Duchess

As a reformed pessimist (although I'm slowly crawling back into the 'all men are dogs' hole), I can see how this may look to some, and as always, i must correct any misconceptions this article may arouse. No, I am not saying that certain qualities should deem a man an outcast, I'm merely proposing the notion of placing all the cards on the table from the start of the game. Yes, a girl may wear butt-pads, wonderbra, fake lashes, weave, and heels, to alter her level of attractiveness. So also do men flash their cash, rock shades, rent cars, throw on Versace coats over Primark outfits, to create the illusion of wealth. Only difference is, the following morning, the guy wakes up to the reality of the chic's standard. A girl wakes up to a plush penthouse apartment thats driving the dude to diamond-mine levels of debt.

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Cover-up your sins with a coat, but the weight of it will surely sink no matter how hard you struggle to keep it afloat. Xisses. 

Gray May Day

I'm a female whose mood is directly affected by the weather. And as England failed to get the 'April Showers, May Flowers' memo, and is pissing down with rain every friggin' day...well, lets just say, I'm not exactly a ray of sunshine lighting up every room atm. Anyway, I was livid yesterday for one of two reasons. First, the whole Tami bullying sitch on Basketball Wives. I think I might just join the boycott for that sole reason....ALTHOUGH I do love me some Ocho Cinco, and wanna see the wedding special, so perhaps not. Secondly, I read an article that just got my blood BOILING and I had to vent on here.

 Poloneck Jumper : Primark | Skirt : H&M | Scarf : Market Kiosk (Goodge St.)

The article on The Lawyer critiqued the new Marriage Foundation's failure to take a stand on gay marriage. As discussed in the Stop The Traffik BLEURGH post, raising awareness of inequality and discrimination, is something I'm rather passionate about. However, what I tend to have qualms with, is the lack of consideration accorded to those who don't share the same opinions as the majority. Yes, I understand that some believe (in the words of Frank Ocean - We All Try) that "marriage isn't believe a man and woman, but between love and love", but why does everyone have to agree with that line of reasoning?

 Soundtrack of the Minute - Adorn : Miguel

Surely the reasoning behind freedom of speech, is the right of all to be able to express their thoughts and beliefs without being penalised. Thus, creating a foundation solely focusing on the betterment of a child's welfare should not have to be attacked about its political viewpoint. NF Parties still exist, and racism is still very much rife in certain parts of the world. Not to mention the discrimination that vulnerable disabled people have to live with, day-in day-out. I'm sick to death of every institution being subjected to public scrutiny in regards to how liberal it is to homosexual individuals. 

Necklace : eBay | Rings : H&M & Bonitas (Croydon) | Chelsea Boots : Dorothy Perkins

The church has undergone several changes to its leadership due to this very topic.  Religious leaders have had to bite their tongue in regards to teachings they have learned from birth in fear of offending members of their congregation. Vicars have had to step down from posts they'd sworn to dedicate their lives to, all because they hadn't addressed the issue politically correct. Honestly? Give it a break. If a Foundation is created to restore the institution of 'family' and rebuild the foundations to ensure healthy upbringing for children, then let it be. There was no specific mention of hetero or homo. so why go hunting?

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Whether it is gray all day in may, I should be free to have my say. Xisses

Ghost of Boyfriend Past

I loved (and still do) English Literature at school, but one lesson I always zoned out of was the analysis of Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol. All that springs to mind is 'ghost of christmas past' (not sure if thats accurate, but feel free to correct me below), and thats exactly the experience I wanted to share with you.

 Shirt : Internacionale | Skirt : Primark 

Now I've reached a turning point in my dating life, which I think is a touch too personal to share on here, but just know there's a crossroads that I'm intending on crossing soon (God willing). Anywho....here I was, on the last day of the 1st 1/3 of 2012, walking idly home, and who else did I bump into but my ex driving by! My tweethearts can bear witness to the near heartattack I had on sight of my scrub-ex ("sitting on the passenger's side, of his best friend's ride trying to holla at me" LOL). What stunned me, however, was the fact that seeing him equated to me making a full-circle. Earlier this year, I'd bumped into all my other exes (some I'd steered away from interaction with), from the most recent to that fateful final day in April.

 Bag : ZARA | Boots : Dorothy Perkins

I'm a firm believer in signs, and seeing all of them catapulted me to a seat on reality's throne. I cannot envision myself in the same relationships I was in all those years ago, and it was stunning to see how far I'd come in contrast to them. Not to belittle their own struggles, but I feel as though I am in a totally different place/ level to them now, all I can see ahead is higher ground. Humans are prone to looking back regretfully, idealising the past. Those blasts from the past jerked me to focus on my present and aspire for a better future.

I'm a manic list-drafter. As you know, I'm fond of drafting charts and drawing mind-maps, and after crossing the 1st 1/3 of the 2012 hurdle, and encountering the final ex, I turned to my leather planner and began scribing. What has been accomplished thus far? What is left to overcome? How can I go about this? Revisiting your New Years' Resolutions, are you still sticking to any of them? Or did you abandon them all on the 2nd of January and blame the fickleness of capitalism on your personal downfall from accomplishing your goals? I for one, fall into the latter category, and could sit here and blame procrastination or whatnot, but instead I'm choosing to pick myself up and try again. I've got to keep believing and striving for better, in order to become the woman I want to be. On retrospect, I can see that my past experiences aren't something to be ashamed of, or regretful over, however I'm thankful for them, as a result of which I have grown into who I am today.

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! If ever you get a visit from a ghost of boyfriend past, steer clear of succumbing to the spell on you they once cast. Xisses

Black Widow

I'm a Marvel Comics STAN and went to watch Avengers 3D with my brother and co-worker over the weekend. I gotta say, having watched the lot.5, this is by far the best comic book adaptation yet! I mean, I'm no Comicon regular, but I know my stuff. I would go as far as divulging the fact that I'd yearn to be caught in some scientific defect so I could prance around in a cool costume, flaunting my superpowers for good  (or evil)...don't judge.

Top : (found in loft) | Skirt : H&M 

A character that struck me was Black Widow, and not for her poor acting skills (yes, its no small fact that I loathe Scarlett Johanson), I mean, chic didn't even TRY to pull off a Russian accent.....poor! What captured my attention, however, was the power of her feminine wiles. She channelled her God-given gift of seduction to retrieve any information she damn-well pleased.

Watch : Guess | Necklace : eBay | Studded Pumps : Urban Outfitters 

Coat : Littlewoods

Oddly enough, not too long ago, a friend of mine asked if I could be an insect, which would I be? After he rejected the idea of me as a scorpion, I settled for a black widow spider. Eerily scary right? I told you reality and fiction were slowly becoming one. Anywhooooo....having brought a few to the point of tears as though they were spilling their sins at Catholic confession booths, I can attest to owning the charm of femininity, manipulation and intellectual seduction. I believe every woman is born with the potential, all it takes is for her to tap into her innate gift/super power. I hadn't realised, but people have testified to me using my 'lawyer skills' to manipulate lay minds into getting what I want. So my skills are far more advanced that what I aim to enlighten mere mortals to, but caring's sharing right?

The black widow spider is ruthless to her prey, slaying her conquests after mating. Hilarity of the weekend was when I was breaking it down on the dancefloor (OMG! Blazerwhore was in attendance....i love that chic), shaking what my mama gave me, and this snail piped up with "I can't handle all of this!!", pointing slowly up and down me like i was a wall being painted before scurrying off. I believe a woman's true charm lies in her sensuality. Toning it down isn't on the cards. Instead, fully learning how to use it to your advantage is of paramount importance. Just when you think Black Widow has been stung by Loki in Avengers, she spins round venomously triumphant. There is no time to waste on spineless creatures, rather invest your time in those who can test your intellect and provide you with a platform for personal development. The black widow is as sexy as she is wise, she is voluptuous as much as she is skilled in her craft. Own it, whatever your gender!

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Embodying your inner black widow may just grant you that lust-after opportunity through a different window. Xisses