Thanks for Sharing

"What's your addiction? Is it money? Is it girls? Is it weed?" Addiction - Kanye West

I won’t lie, I’m not an open book. In fact, I have been likened to an onion in the past; the process of revelation is several layers deep. Just last week, in an endeavour to open up to someone I tweeted “Sharing is overrated. Conclusions drawn. Judgment made. Advice doled. Redundant #BLEURGH”.  However, after watching ‘Thanks for Sharing’ over the weekend, I can surely see its benefits.

Coat : Warehouse Exclusive | Crop Top : New Look | Skirt : DIY Ankara

Thanks for Sharing chronicles the life of 3 men undergoing the 12-step recover process for their sex addiction (nymphomania). Being of African descent, I must apologise for my lack of knowledge or awareness of addictions and their effect. It is somewhat stigmatised in my culture as a product of sin/temptation/ the devil; nothing that cannot be overcome through divine intervention/rituals (dependent on your belief). However, my eyes have become all the more exposed to nymphomania and the griping effects it has on its victims after unpreparedly watching ‘Don Jon’ on the plane ride home from Nigeria last spring. I was stunned at the dependency the addict felt to the cathartic release derived from pornographic or explicit material, and was troubled by the hours wasted on sexual gratification as a result.

Matters of the Heart at The LOST Theatre, London

Much like ‘Thanks for Sharing’, ‘Matters of the Heart’ is a play about 6 characters leading very different lives, but brought together by one issue; love. Both productions may have very different subject matters, but what bonds the two is their depiction of the benefits of sharing. In ‘Thanks for Sharing’, group meetings for recovering addicts is portrayed as an open forum for mutual support for addicts at different stages of recovery to motivate, console and just share their journey with one another. In ‘Matters of the Heart’, sharing is a lot more organic, with girly catch-ups at work and male bonding at the bar, being the forums for divulging intimate details of their love lives to one another. Singles share their plight to find The One with struggling married wives who’ve lost the spark, and it is the unity in their shared woes that love is an ongoing battle that strikes me.

Necklace : Primark | Heels : Red Herring (Debenhams)

We are all fighting our personal battles, and it is always advised to open up to another for advice, care, love, and support, etc. ‘A problem shared is a problem halved’. I’ve never really understood it. In fact, I’ve fought a one-woman-war against it. It might have something to do with me striving to knock down the image that women are weak or emotional creatures? But as I’ve matured, I have found that strength is relatively defined, and the emotional nature of womanhood is not actually a bad thing. In my bid to fight off this image of dependency, I became so bogged down in my issues that my problems were always resolved through a subjective lens. Yes, I reach the end goal eventually, but perhaps it would have been quicker and less painful, had I chosen to share my woes with another who’d grant an objective approach and offer a forum of solace and support for me to lean on instead. I am in no way fixed, and neither were the addicts in the movie who may (or may not have – I am REALLY trying not to give away any spoiler alerts in case you wanted to watch it yourself) have relapsed, but I am learning to see the benefits of opening up and reaping the rewards of emotional intimacy with a trusted party (be it family, friends, or partner).

"Life is a journey you never have to take alone" Thanks for Sharing. BLEURGH!