What's Your Number?

**DISCLAIMER - This post is NOT PG 13 material!**

Just finished watching 'Whats Your Number' with the usually irritating slapstick-clutz Anna Farris & the yummy yummy in my tummy Chris Evans :) *wolf whistles* Not one for spoiler-alerts, so I'll carefully tread around the predictable plot & just dish on what can be viewed in the trailer (which practically summarises the entire movie). Anna Farris hits rock bottom in her life and reads this article which states that the average woman has 10.5 hook-ups in her lifetime before meeting The One. Obviously, the movie was based around an older protagonist but I can relate. The movie's (and magazines, and the WORLD that isn't frigid) idea of hookups focused solely on sex, but when my friends and I delve into the pits of a 'keeping score' game like this, we tend to waver around the nitty-gritty and stick to 'The Hills' concept of 'hooking up' *coughs*

Blazer : H&M | Body : Primark | Paperbag Peglegs : ASOS

10.5 is average? REALLY?!? I dunno how the rest of you girlies feel (and I'm sure guys reading this may have passed that score long before they left high school) but I think that score is relatively .....ah ah now! *wags fingers cheekily* A lady never tells. Either way, whether you believe the number to be high or low in regards to how much experience a woman carries under her belt before chaining her poom to one guy for eternity, I'd still have to question who has the right to calculate the average?

 Heels : Miss Selfridge | Casio Watch : eBay | Rings : Dorothy Perkins & Cousin's | Stud : Dorothy Perkins | Fur Stole (detached from cardigan) : Etam

In a world where morals are flung to the wind and the mention of God only clumsily escapes majority's lips as a form of excitable exclamation (OMG!), I am forced to question where statistics like this are drafted from? Farris in the movie, fears exceeding her 20th hook-up and embarks on a mission to find all her exes and try and work through whatever the issue was initially, rather than have sex with yet another douche, adding to the number. I'll leave you guys to watch and find out whether she succeeds at this or not...but I think the answer to that is pretty obvious.

Exes are exes for a reason. They are a blatant memo, reminding you of what you are no longer attracted to, and the person you no longer are. Numbers? Yes, we live in an ever-judgmental society and its naive to think no-one keeps tabs but I feel like the 'average' is bullsh*t! In life, we make mistakes and learn from them, some learn quicker than others. The same can be translated in the dating world. Some girls (and yes heifers! I envy you!) find their highschool sweethearts, date them all the way through University and marry them just after landing that high-class job in the city firm. Others, trudge through douche after douche, drafting up an endless list of 'The Perfect Man' and then just when they're ready to throw in the towel, out Prince Charming comes to sweep them off their feet when they least expect it. Thats the fairytale. Whats a number on that?

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Whats Your Number? In fact, who the hell cares? Xisses

Muse Origins Feat. BLEURGH

It was SUCH an honour to be featured on upcoming e-zine Muse Origins. 

The questions challenged me & my perception of style Vs fashion. I feel like fashion (especially if you're a highstreet or fashion magazine fiend) is so fleeting (or 'seasonal' as I stated in the feature), but style is eternal. My style has grown with me, and sometimes I look back and think "WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME I LOOKED LIKE AN ABSOLUTE GOON?!" 

Quite honestly, I've always been one of those girls that get asked "what are you wearing?" by a passer-by and I've always relished stating where each item is from as I feel like my wardrobe are little members of my family and all share personal (fond) memories with me. I guess that's why creating BLEURGH seemed like an enjoyable (and natural) hobby to delve into.

I'd definitely blame my parents for being the origin behind my vanity. My father would give annual 'Christmas Funds' when we were little for clothes shopping, dating as far back as when we lived in Nigeria. My parents loved the fact that I had aunties abroad and would use it to my advantage 'cos I could rock pretty dresses that no-one else in class owned. My first memory of being the centre of attention because of my attire was when my Uncle themed his entire wedding train around a peach party dress he'd seen me wear. He took my dress as a sample and had tailors create (pretty bad, in my opinion) orange replicas for the little bridesmaids (needless to say I was the best dressed chic on that train).

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! What are your earliest style memories (or muse origins) and share your take on Fashion Vs. Style below. Xisses

Lolli Day!

This is actually a belated post...but yesterday was my **8Baller **Lolli's (from LolliHearts) 22nd Birthday. Twenty-two. I know! Its SUCH a meeeeeh age, but one that has to be passed to  all the same to move on to greater dates. She had no plans...and by no plans, I mean ZERO! When I called, she was literally moping around at home doing nada, ZILCH then I asked her to pick up her butt and meet me for lunch.

Waistcoat : Republic | Jumper : H&M | Leather Leggings : Bershka

I treated her to a local treat (as we live a walk away from one another), and we spent the afternoon reminiscing and planning ahead, and generally just indulging in the same ol' banter. Its great spending time with friends that you've known a while back, and just to take a step back and realise how much they've grown. I remember the first time I met Lolli, she was sitting in a corner at a family friend's gathering, and didn't utter a word for the entire evening. Such a striking contrast to how we spent the day! Could hardly stick a pipe down this chic's throat to silence her....she was on a ROLL! LOL

Impromptu Lunch at Harversters

LolliDay is a play on words on her actual Nigerian name, but also stands for a really chilled birthday, the kind I'd also love to indulge in, come my 22nd. It was filled with fun, friendship and food...my three favourite f's. I asked her a question myself & my sister ask on our birthdays, "what do you hope to accomplish by your next birthday?" and she narrowed the list down to just one thing, of which she believed once she had sorted, all else would fall in place. I admire Lolli and her sense of direction , no matter how misguided she may believe her path to be.

Hat : Forever 21 | Necklace : Claire's Accesories | Watch : Guess | Wedges : eBay | Rings : Dorothy Perkins & Matalan

LolliDay is so blessed as its also my another **8Baller, **YaaYaa's Birthday as well as Lolli's younger brother from The Taste Level (twins separated by 2 years....freaky!) and I'm so glad to have been selfish enough to share the day with her. She's honestly one of those friends that wont communicate for a century but when we catch up, its like time never passed. Ok...better wrap this up before my balls hang any lower.

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Indulge in a LolliDay equivalent for your friend's birthday & experience the joy that good friendship has to pay. Xisses

Crazy, Stupid, Love.

Not since Jake Gyllenhal's character in Love & Other Drugs have I fallen for a character quite like I did Jacob from Crazy, Stupid, Love. Another BLEURGH 'Must-See' but I'm sure 50% of you are like...woman! Late much? Jacob, played by Ryan Gosling (as you guys will remember from my 'Blue Valentine' post), whom I'm infatuated with...completely embodies my perfect man. He is a slick, smooth-talking lothario that frequents the same bar, and never fails to exit with company. His formula, and a recurring theme through-out the movie, is the power of charm on a woman.

 Blazer : Thrifted (Croydon) | Fur Stole (detached from old cardigan) : Etam | Top : H&M 

Leggings : Bershka

I'm a self-professed Sucker for Love (if you guys are not familiar with that vintage Danity Kane track, I will be VERY upset) and I may be rusty on the topic, but I feel like love is one of those universal emotions that transcends time. The movie pits Cal (played by Steve Carell....and YES! I can't stand the guy but he toned down his slap-stick mannerisms in this movie so he wasn't so bad), and whose lack of sponteneity and outgrowth of romance in his marriage permits brief waywardness of his wife's heart, against Jacob and his nightly conquests. The summary to the naked eye is that women are moved by smaller things and it only takes a fickle compliment to land us in bed. But the underlying message, in my opinion is that love takes work, far more than a throwaway comment about a woman's appearance or ravenous sex. I know my male readers switched off there LOL.

 Necklace : Dorothy Perkins | Belt : New Look | Bag : Warehouse | Studded Pumps : Urban Outfitters

Casio Watch : eBay | Leather Bracelets : Souveneirs (Gran Canaria & Scotland)

The movie depicts love in the eyes of three generations. The young teens who are smitten to insanity and driven by their childish whiles to extreme levels of displays of affection. Then there are the 20-somethings (awesomely depicted by my boo, Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone, whom I believe to be my on-screen counterpart) who fall unexpectedly in love, and are ill-equipped for the emotions attached, but find themselves taking each day as it comes and succeeding at it beyond their expectations. And then there's the married/divorced couple who fall in and out of love and prove that passion, spontaneity and self-discovery are all part of love, and enough room for each should be provided for a healthy, loving relationship.

Soundtrack of the Minute : Made in America - JayZ & Kanye West (Watch the Throne)

Love can turn your world upside down in more ways than one. Whether it be falling IN love, or falling out and having your heart broken. However, emotionless flings and racking up sexual conquests left, right & centre wont heal the chasm left in your heart, as conveyed in the movie. The embrace of one self, the acceptance that love itself has its flaws, and making a choice to mend those wounds is what enables true love to prevail. Its hard to see movies like this which unequivocally champion the existence of true love without choking you up in cheese, but this movie manages to deliver.

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! "You have to fight for your soulmate" - Crazy, Stupid, Love. Xisses

Menswear Mondays : The Scottish Kilt

I took a road trip to Scotland last weekend with my siblings for my brother's marathon run in Inverness. We went SO far up North, we were literally in the clouds you see halo-ing the mountains! This is a bit of a quirky post as not many men will nod at the appeal of donning a kilt, but I LOVED spotting the bag-pipers hooting away, briskly strolling across the fields in different coloured kilts. Its near impossible to visit Scotland & not  get wrapped up in its culture, so for the purposes of this post, the kilt symbolises a man's embrace of his cultural roots.

Turban (actually a pashmina/scarf) : Market (Manchester?) | Shirt : Blanco (Gran Canaria) | Kilt (actually a Skirt) : Thrifted | Brogues : New Look

Having a lot of guy friends from different parts of the world, I've learned that the most fascinating conversations (...debates....arguments....ok, sometimes it turns into a full-on verbal brawl) are held by those whose roots are deeply embedded in their culture. The wealth of knowledge that's bred with such native awareness is entrancing to most women. Speaking to a few older ladies of late, it seems that we are members of a lost generation. As fortunate as some may view migrants from a 3rd world to a western country, the disadvantage of this is the wash that comes with it. Like the natural springs we spotted along the motorway to Scotland, it seems the purest remains at the source.

However, the dumb few have interpreted having a rich cultural background as being equivalent to thumping one's chest and dismissing the woman to the kitchen *hmph*. Men seem to have forgotten chivalry, courting and all that richness that also trails with having a strong cultural background. Yes, a woman may be impressed when a man chimes out his native culinary dish, but taking it that step further and expecting her to jump at the chance at preparing it, JUST to please a man, is somewhat archaic (in my perspective). Having witnessed one too many tales of female heartbreaks at the clumsiness of 'cultured' men, I am forced to question its appeal. Yes, who isn't attracted to a man with a diverse 'interest' list on his social CV, stretching beyond "jamming to grime in my yard" and whatnot? Its highly comical watching chics who still crawl around waste-men, or entertain sleazy pavement movements...but the contrast to that is somewhat daunting.

My culture's equivalent of a kilt is a wrapper, and its touching visiting the village and spotting elders sporting them. Sadly, Igbo men in the UK are far removed from that, and barely don such attires to big events, talk less of on a casual outing. Unlike other cultures, Igbo is thought to be on the list of Top 10 languages to go extinct in the next 10 years....heartbreaking. As heart-wrenching as the thought of a loss of cultural identity is, I'm somewhat pleased that flushed with it goes the Igbo-man's misogynist perspective. What would be great would be a marriage of the two. Quite like the kilt is paired with contemporary shirts on the top-half, I'd love to see more men with a mix of Igbo cultural heritage and an embrace of modern Western life.

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Disregard of cultural heritage is plagued by guilt, so time to embrace your roots with your equivalent of a kilt. Xisses

In Colourful Company

As the world bids adieu to another great this year, I thought it only right to pay homage to the mastermind behind the world's most colourful company. As a great fan of Apple products (Owning a Macbook, 3rd Generation iPod Nano & iPhone4...looking to purchase the iPad soon too), I was moved by what the late Steve Jobs achieved in the 56years of his life.

Blazer : Thrifted | Top : Allders | Neck Candy : TK Maxx | Belt & Trousers : ZARA 

Bag : Warehouse | Pumps : Urban Outfitters

I love colours and the vibe it exudes on a monochrome outfit, adding that extra bit of pizzazz to the mix. The same was thought of those original quirky iMacs (with the HUGE bums?) with the rainbow colourful backs. Such a breath of fresh air from the boring off-white Compaqs and whatnots flooding the market. Steve Jobs constantly thought outside the box (don't worry guys...I'm not going for gold in a bid to write his autobiography, my point is soon to hit home), pushing the boundaries of eclectic technology. And when even HE could see that he was reaching the end of his tether, he willingly resigned. Point? A truly wise man knows when to call on the help of his team.

Things don't always work out in exactly the way you plan them....even when you set out plans, goals and psych yourself up to the point you worry whether you'd secretly inhaled some e-tablets in your sleep. However, this doesn't grant you an all-access pass to the world of self-pity, instead it prompts you to keep pushing the boundaries. At one point, Steve Jobs lost BILLIONS in a year alone, yet he passed away OWNING those billions and more. In the wise words of my brother, Dr. Obi"Stay Hungry, Don't Settle". Jobs didn't wallow in self-pity, and drown his sorrows in binge-eating, retail therapy OR indulge in a frivolour lifestyle (well, to my knowledge...), instead he reinvented the brand, with the net-worth of Apple totalling to that of an entire continent! CRAZY right?

My point is, Jobs' Apple achievements were not a solo-venture. Donning coloured trousers on a lunch date with my bestie & ex-roommate hoping to spice up my dull outfit, didn't quite achieve the results I'd hoped for. However, it wasn't until I caught sight of HER coloured jeans that my mood was lifted. Sometimes, it takes an external effort to really make a difference. Jobs spoke of owning the "courage to follow your heart and intuition", but having lived a selfish life for a year (remember "2010 is me!"? Oh dear!), you learn that simply following your own voice tends to sound like an echo, and may not actually be intuition, but rather your foolishness drowning your reasoning.

This post is dedicated to all my lovely followers who read, follow and Bleurgh back at me occasionally. You guys really brighten up my day. x

Soundtrack of the Minute - No Church in the Wild : Jay Z & Kanye West (Watch The Throne)

Onyxsta says...BLEURGH!! Misery needs company, but thats counterproductive if the company is a contrast to your melancholy. Xisses